The Phoenix

In this exact point in time, there are approximately 6,786,928,134 people, roaming this world.

Every 13 seconds a human dies. Some lonely, depressed person out there probably wishes that upon themselves every single day, while some fear death so much that it consumes them and some just take it in and accept the fact that death will come for us, it’s just a matter of when.

For me, it could have been on May 30th, 2009. The day my whole world changed. The day the Smackdowneth was Layeth on me, where life gave me the Rock Bottom (Wrestling talk).
To this day it still haunts me, to this day, metaphorically speaking, I can't breathe, I hold my breath in from the trauma that is stuck like glue in my mind. My heart is a wrestling ring and my Past and my Present are fighting against each other. It's hard. As much as I try, I cannot erase this pain and this mistake.

That night I felt I died. But the next couple of days, I felt like I was reborn.

Every 7 seconds, a baby is born. Such joy it brings, a new life, a baby so innocent and so pure. With no knowledge about what life is, don’t we just wish we could be like that. Have a time where mistakes are just erased and we become clean once again. Or don't you wish you could tell that innocent, pure baby you once were, about what not to do or what not to say when they grow up. I already have a list of those things, that we form into regrets.

My present speaking to my past:
Don't fall for that girl, she'll eat you up and tear you apart for the rest of your days.
Don't pick up that first Winfield Red cigarette, by the time you get to my age you'd probably be a millionaire and you'd be more healthy.
Also don't pick up that bottle of beer or bourbon, one day you're going to sprain your ankle and it's going to take you out for 3 weeks out of work, oh and to add onto that, a couple weeks later, you'll get into a car crash that's going to turn your life upside down.
Don't lie and speak so ill about your parents, they sacrifice a lot for you, and don't ever think they never loved you, because they do with all their hearts.
Most importantly I'll say, take up your cross and follow God, it'll be the best thing that's ever happened to you.

But it's our regrets, it's our tests and trials and it's our experiences that shape who we become. Since we aren't able to talk to our past selves, in that pure baby form that we once were, we stand here, with the sole fact, that everything that has happened until this point in time, happened for a reason. At the end of the day, it's really our choice how we deal with our problems and our tests in life, some would think I'm stupid, but because of my experiences, I've learnt to find happiness in the darkest times.

If you find yourself, facing your giants and facing your obstacles, your reward will be so much greater than you could ever imagine. But if you find yourself running away from your obstacles and life tests, you'll find yourself being depressed, sad, using alcohol in the means to escape the harsh reality you've been placed, you'll feel sorry for yourself, you'll blame everyone except for yourself for everything you've done, if you live your life like this, one day you will crash and burn, just like I did. Literally.

I said goodbye to that person I was, and instead of looking at my past, I look at my future, your future is always brighter, it's your positivity, it's your prayers, it's your goals, it's the people in your life who create that brighter future, and it's God. Every question you ask, or every question you asked, God has, is and always will be the answer. You just have to believe in it.